The child withiin and lack of control

When many people talk of their "inner child", they are referring to a metaphorical part of themselves. For those of us with DID, this can be a very literal reference to a part of themselves, an alter if you will. For me, that is a very curious seven year old that sometimes gets me into alot of trouble. And sometimes injured. For instances, a few weeks ago, I walked into my living room and noticed my youngest ones swing sitting in the corner. This particular swing comes apart. The swing comes out and doubles as a bouncy seat. Well, said set was out of it and the little bar that holds toys for baby to bat at was turned down....looking just like a little swing seat. I walked over to it, my adult self says "Don't do it" But that little girl didn't listen. She wanted to swing and there was no stopping her. She sat down, pulled her feet off the floor and a second later I was fully back in my body in great pain as I landed tail bone first on the hardwood floor. Yeah, it was kinda funny. At least after I could breathe again. I still can't sit right. It still hurts weeks later. Most of the time, when I switch, a part of me remains present. I just have little to no control for a few minutes, Also there is another part of me that is 16 or so. She also has very little control of herself. She goes after what she wants with little regard to the consequences. It's not like with the little one. She don't put things in her mouth, she don't try stupid stunts. It's very different. She craves love and attention. She wants people to want her. And she doesn't care who gets hurt in the process. This includes me. She also tends to attract the type of men that want to be with young teens. She has gotten me into more trouble than I care to admit and gotten us into situations that we could not get out of. Now I know alot of people think DID is crap, but really, it's just not like they show it on TV. It is very real for me. I just want to be one again. Sure it's sometimes fun for the kid part of me to me out. But more often than not, she makes her appearance at just the wrong time. And then there's " The Bitch". She is the hardest one to deal with. She comes and goes quickly but she leaves behind destruction. I don't have control of any of these others. I may be able to gain control eventually, but by then, the damage is done. And I don't like not having control. I work hard to maintain my control. This is not just a physical thing. It is, in fact, mostly emotional. And it toys with my emotions. It makes me feel things I often don't want to feel. And I am just lost.